In the interest of complete disclosure, I have not seen nor read any of the Twilight material. I have no intention of delving into it any time soon. I am not its target demo. All information regarding the content of the film is gleaned from reviews, commercials, trailers, and second hand sources who wish to remain nameless lest their loved ones find out what utter sissy-pants they actually are.
But from what I’ve heard, the Twilight series violates everything I know about vampires, werewolves, and the basics of human speech and emotion. Vampires twinkle in the sunlight?!? Werewolves change whenever they get angry?!? Actors can read their lines off a script while being filmed and it makes the final cut?!?
Stephen King says that the author can’t write. Mike Nelson of MST3K fame claims that it isn’t the worst movie of all time, it is simply the worst THING of all time. Rotten Tomatoes gives it 29%. The commercials make me envy the dead, that they have shunted the mortal coil that may have been tainted by this film. We must all come to terms with the fact that we live in a world where Twilight exists. We are the ones who must bear that responsibility and find a way to live with it.
Also, Tiger Woods is an ass. Never mind that his wife is a Swedish super-model, but the guy’s got two kids, one of whom was still in the womb while these affairs were allegedly taking place. I don’t think I’m holding him to a higher standard because he’s a celebrity. I hold him to a higher standard because he is a father.
You know, it’s funny. I haven’t seen the movies either, but there’s all sorts of hilarious parody out there. The last three webcomics at our site have been Twilight based.
Maybe that’s Twilight’s gift to the world: the amount of humor gleaned from its terribleness. And I have been reading your guys’ strips regarding the movie. The dead pets had me lol’ing. Plus the bit about The Golden Compass actually made me think. When did your site become so thought provoking?
The two of us are actually fairly intellectual and sensitive guys. The strip often ends up being a space for us to be dumb and crude. Occasionally a glimmer of our true selves comes through. Thanks for the link, by the way.